Our Shared Horizon (Kaitlyn and the Highlander Book 10) Page 3
While leaning on one arm he tried to open and close the zipper, so I explained that part too.
Then I gave him more presents. They were from me but I told him they were from Magnus because I had grown embarrassed by how ‘needy’ this all had been: A multitool. Binoculars. A collapsible fishing pole with tackle.
“Och, I like this verra much.” He held the pole and practiced casting it out. “Thank ye for bringin’ the presents. I am sorry I daena have anything for ye.” He leaned back in the grass.
“Well, you didn’t know I was coming back, did you? I’m sure you would have had something amazing if you had known. That’s okay, I really really really like giving people presents. It’s kind of my thing. When someone makes me take a present, I just think the whole time how awful it is that I didn’t have a better one to give them. It’s kind of a whole power trip.”
“Explain that tae me.”
“Power trip?” I stared off into space. “Like it’s the one way that I’m important.”
He was looking up at me his eyes squinted in the sun. “Och, ye are verra important.”
“It’s nice of you to say.” I plucked at the grass by my knees.
He asked, “Ye said that Kaitlyn was with bairn?”
“Yes. She sure is.”
“Och, I thought she was barren, I am glad for Magnus, but I am also sorry for him that she inna.”
“Really? That’s a surprising thing to say, you don’t want kids?”
“I have seen what bringin’ forth a bairn can do tae a woman. M’wife had been verra healthy, but then the bairn dinna survive and then she...” His voice caught.
I wanted to hold his hand, to nestle up beside him, wrap my arms around him, but none of that was acceptable. I had to just sit here beside him, nodding and commiserating from afar. None of this was my place. I had no place here.
I said, “I’m so very sorry about your loss, Fraoch, I really am.”
“Twas a long time ago.”
“You say that, but still... What happened long ago is tucked away inside our hearts, but it needs to come out sometimes. We need to think on the time and the people, before we tuck them away again. It’s important. You can talk about her to me whenever you need to...”
Except I wasn’t going to be here.
His thoughts must have been on it too. “When are ye leavin’?”
“I thought today, but maybe tomorrow morning. I need to say goodbye to Lizbeth before.”
“Och.”
I pulled a Snickers bar from my bag. “Want to taste the best thing ever?” I unwrapped it, bit off the very end, then passed it to him.
He dutifully bit and chewed, his face going through about ten hilarious expressions. “Tis verra odd.” He smacked his lips and grimaced.
“Too sugary for you?”
“Aye, tastes like lickin’ the underside of a beehive without the fun of the bees.”
I laughed. “You think bees are fun?”
He took another big bite of the candy bar before returning it to me, grimacing and shuddering. “Och, tis too verra sweet. And aye, bees are fun, ye daena like bees?”
“Don’t they sting you?”
“Ye just bat them away.”
We both laughed.
“You know, the young woman you’re going to marry, she probably has very different views on babies. You’re probably going to have a few, I would think.”
He watched me while I spoke. “Aye, she will be wantin’ bairn. All women want them.”
“I don’t. Not really. I mean, I thought you would want to, so I was trying to be okay with the idea, but...”
I didn’t know what to say.
“You are correct, Madame Hayley, Elen MacNichol will be wantin’ a bairn though she daena want me.”
“She doesn’t?”
“Nae, she is terrified of me. She is verra young and haena sense in her head about any of this...”
“But her father is going to force her to?”
“He sees me as a good match for her, now that he has been persuaded. She inna allowed tae have an opinion on it.”
“What do you mean, ‘now that he has been persuaded’?”
“When he saw yer presents last night — he kent they were from Magnus, a verra rich man and a good friend of mine. Now he is verra keen on the prospect of me as his new son-in-law.”
“Oh, great. Glad I could help.” I sighed.
“I daena want tae talk on her anymore,” his eyes glinted, “Did ye bring me more presents?”
I grinned and rifled through my bag. “I did, I have another one.” I pulled out a stack of comic books. “This is about Thor. You know, the god I named your horse after?”
“I daena ken what it...?”
“It’s a book. See? The story of his life.” I held it wide.
He studied the page for a moment. “I canna make sense of it.”
“Can you read?”
His brow furrowed, “I can sign m’name, I haena a need for more.”
“Sure, of course. I hadn’t really thought of that. But I brought them all this way and you’ll love this story, Fraoch. Can I read it to you?”
“Aye.”
Five - Hayley
Facing him, I read, holding my finger on each square as I went. The first row he asked ten questions: what is that color? I had to show him how the lines made a shape and that shape was a man, wielding a hammer. What was the bubble? What dost the words mean? I kind of wondered if this was even a reasonable expectation, to introduce an eighteenth century man to the Marvel Comics Universe. But then, bottom of the page, he asked one question, “What is this, Madame Hayley?”
“That’s his chariot.” And as I continued reading I glanced at his face, he was intently listening.
I was sitting in a difficult position though, crosslegged, wearing a tight bodice while bent over the book, simultaneously holding it open yet reading the pages upside down, so mid-read, without even thinking about it, I rolled to my back and shimmied over so my head was against his ear. I held the comic book above us, using one of my fingers to show the progression of the squares as I spoke, taking long pauses so he could investigate the images and....
Two pages later, with my finger trailing along, showing him an explosion that threatened Thor’s very existence, Fraoch’s hand rose and enclosed mine, so slowly, so quietly.
I stopped reading.
All my concentration was on his big strong hand wrapped around mine.
Then he slowly, ever so slowly, lowered my hand to his lips and kissed my finger. He brought it to his chest and clutched it there. His breath drawing in and exhaling out.
The comic book was unsteady in the air, a breeze rustling its page. I lowered it to the grass between us and turned to look at the side of his face.
Finally he said, “Och.”
A tear slid down my cheek.
He said, “I wanted tae spend m’life with ye.”
“Me too.”
And then he let go of my hand, took me by the waist, and pulled me toward him. Our cheeks pressed, the edge of his mouth so close to mine, his beard against my skin, rough and soft. There were so many sensations, weight on my side, breath by my ear, the dampness of his worried brow, the sun’s heat had warmed his skin — his eyes clamped tight.
We were right there together as if we had just bumped against each other accidentally. We weren’t supposed to touch, and we definitely weren’t supposed to — with a rumbling growl in his throat his lips found mine, and pressed and pressed some more, until my lips parted and oh...
My arms went around his neck, my fingers entwined in his hair. His broad shoulders and thick arms stretched around me, his chest pressed against me.
We paused.
My breath was fast and gasping. This bodice did not help. I looked in his eyes and he looked back in mine. His hand smoothed my hair back from my own heated brow and I lifted my chin to receive the next sweet kiss full of licks and nibbles and tastes of each other and...
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I groaned. And it broke the spell.
He dropped his head to mine, heavy with worry, weighted with regret, he moaned, and the gravity of him reminded me that we didn’t have permission for this.
He pulled away and sat up, his arms around his knees.
I sat up, patted my hair and then leaned on my arms. “Master Fraoch, this is a pickle.”
“My apologies for kissin’ ye, Madame Hayley, I ken ye arna mine. Twas a inconsideration tae force m’self on ye and—”
“I wanted you to kiss me so freaking bad.”
“I daena understand why. I am nae good enough for ye, Madame Hayley. If yer father was here he would nae agree tae—”
“My father has literally no say in this. At all. None. I know that might not make sense to you, it’s different from here, but I get to make all my own decisions, for good or bad. I decided to jump here to see you. I came all that way to kiss you. You are good enough for me. You’re who I want.”
“I canna believe it.”
We were sitting knee to knee, I gingerly wrapped one of my fingers around one of his. We both stared down at our fingers, entwined,
“I’m the one that’s not good enough for you.” I said, “I don’t have land or a farm or a family...”
He enclosed my hand in both of his. “Och, tis nae what I want.”
“You don’t?”
“Nae.”
“What do you want then?”
“I daena ken — a man cave…” He grinned. “A squirrel tae eat and an orange. I want tae go fishin’ on a sunny day and tae ride in the hills with ye.”
I laughed. “I was wondering when you were going to mention me. That seemed like the perfect time to say something romantic and it took you long enough. You want me?”
“Aye, but I canna offer ye anythin’. Twould nae be fair tae hae ye living in squalor, the wife of a beggar. I am a verra good beggar, but a beggar still.”
“You sound like you’re afraid, I did not expect that of you.”
“Afraid? What is Fraoch afraid of? Nothing.”
“You’re afraid of me. You’re afraid of the future.”
He scowled. “I am nae afraid of ye, I am afraid for ye. I canna protect ye from a future I canna understand. I ken this world, tis a bleak place for ye. I would have laid down my life for m’wife and in the end it dinna matter. I had nae say in it, she was gone.”
“I am a different woman, Fraoch. I can shoot. I can hunt. And I’m not going to have children. There. I said it. I can take care of myself. There is nothing to fear.”
He shook his head.
“So what are you going to do? Are you going to be afraid of protecting me and so you’ll marry Elen MacNichol?” I struggled to my feet and brushed and settled my skirts, blew hair from my eyes. “I will tell you one thing, Fraoch, If you marry that girl, you will break my heart. Break it into pieces.”
“I have struck a deal, I am tae be a man of m’word.”
I stamped a foot. “No. No no no no no. Fraoch, you will not. You are already promised to me. You didn’t say it, but you’re my friend, and I love you, and came all the way here to tell you, and if you send me away — I don’t know... This is what you’re supposed to be protecting me from. Don’t you see? When my parents split up I didn’t think this feeling could happen, that I deserved to be loved. But then I met you, and you’re mine. Mine. You’re supposed to marry me and love me forever. And if you tell me no, Fraoch — you better not. You can’t do it. You can’t.”
“Och, ye are in a fury.”
“Damn right. I’m furious. You killed a squirrel for me. Have you ever killed a squirrel for Elen MacNichol?”
“Nae, I have barely said two words tae her.”
“Arrgh. And you’re going to choose her life over mine? You are not allowed to.”
“Ye are commandin’ me?”
“Yes, this is a command. You can tell Elen and her father, and Lizbeth and Madame Greer, that you thought you were allowed tae marry Mistress MacNichol, but that you were mistaken. You tell them you forgot that you already promised me you were going to love me. You didn’t say it in words, because you thought I was married, but you prayed about it, right?”
He watched me. “Aye, I begged God for strength because I loved ye.”
“See? You told God. And now I’m here. You would be going against your word to God — and before you ask if this is a test, it’s not. This is not one of those moments where God is asking you to be even stronger. He’s not playing a game with you. He heard your heart and he heard mine and here we are, surrounded by comic books, in the hills of eighteenth century Scotland, and you are not allowed to marry Elen MacNichol because I’m commanding you to marry me.”
A slow smile spread across his face. He looked up at me, squinting in the sun. “Madame Hayley has commanded me tae marry her?”
I huffed. “It’s not exactly how I wanted it to happen, but I love you. I thought that was an impossible thing, to love like this and have you love me back, and so there is a great deal of my heart that is at stake here and you should really...” My voice trailed off as he climbed to his feet and stood before me.
He stepped closer, coming up very very close. “If I am tae be Fraoch MacLeod married tae Madame Hayley, am I tae be commanded all the time?”
“Och,” I joked. “Probably. I mean, it’s my way, I suspect, but I think you’ll see that I really just want what’s best and I have a lot of opinions on—”
His arms went around me and he stopped me with a kiss, lifting me around the waist, raising me from the ground, pressing and holding, my arms around his neck. I was weightless and held. He buried his face in the space between my neck and my shoulder and we hugged, closer and tighter. He said, “I love ye, Madame Hayley.”
My voice was muffled against his shoulder. “You’re going to marry me?”
“Aye, I am goin’ tae marry ye. Ye will be Hayley MacDonald.”
“Can I tell people that’s my new surname?”
“Nae, we will need tae use MacLeod, twas m’mother’s name, tis a good name.” He lowered my feet to the ground.
I held a hand on both of his cheeks and looked up in his eyes. “I will be Mrs Fraoch MacLeod? Maybe you should ask me, really ask me, just because this is kind of surreal and I will need to explain it to Kaitlyn and it needs to be a good story.”
He took a step back and held my hands in his. “Madame Hayley, I ken I am nae much tae offer ye—”
“You are enough.”
“I am nae as handsome as Og Maggy, I am nae a king, I daena have a castle—”
“You also don’t have evil people chasing you through time.”
“Daena interrupt me, I am tryin’ tae be romantic.”
“Stop comparing yourself to Mags, or I’ll keep interrupting you.”
He smiled down at me, I smiled up.
“I daena have much but I will give it all tae ye, and I will live every day tryin’ tae be more for ye. Would ye be m’wife?”
“Tell me why.”
His eyes glinted. “Tae spend every day of the rest of our lives wakin’ up with ye.”
I nodded. “I am pretty epic in the morning, a little more...”
“I will listen tae the sweet sounds of ye complainin’.” His voice went up an octave, “‘Och, Master Fraoch, ye are a frightful smell’ and ‘I wish I had a cup of somethin’ tae drink,’ and I will hunt for us, and I will fish and ye will cook for me—”
“Or maybe we can hire someone to cook for both of us and I will just do the complaining part. Then I can go with you on hunting trips and fishing trips, so you can always hear me telling you things. So you won’t miss me.”
“Och I miss ye when ye arna with me.”
“You do?”
“I canna think of anythin’ else but ‘I wonder what Madame Hayley would say on this’. I miss ye and I daena want tae be without ye.”
I gave him a sad smile. “Yes.”
“Aye? Ye are sayin’ aye ta
e Fraoch MacLeod?”
“Aye, I am saying aye. I will marry you and spend the rest of my life with you.”
“Och!” He grinned. “Och, ye are goin’ tae be m’wife.” He picked me up and lowered me to the grass and climbed onto me, and lay on me — a big man, all muscles and weight and width and height and girth and a little like being pinned under a dresser. His big bearded face kissed me again and I kissed him back. “Ye will like me tae kiss ye?”
“Oh hell yeah, I’ve been waiting for you to kiss me for so very very long.”
We kissed for more and longer and it was rough and pressing and heavy and big, and he was beginning to lose himself in his want for me, I could tell, his mood was becoming insistent.
I put a hand on both sides of his cheeks, looked him in the eyes, and reminded him that I was there. “Fraoch, I don’t know the rules, aren’t we supposed to wait until after the wedding?”
His face his lips his mouth just inches away from mine. His breath was bullish. “Aye.”
“So what’s our plan?”
“I will marry ye on the morrow. I will speak tae Lizbeth on it taenight. I think I would like tae move ye tae the inn, so ye winna be kept in another man’s rooms.”
“Okay, that sounds good. We’ll tell them at dinner and then I’ll go get a room at the inn. I brought gold.”
He pulled his head up. “Ye did?”
“I did.”
“Tis Magnus’s wealth?’
“No, it’s my own. I just recently sold a big house to a King and Queen and I have a nice bit of cash in the bank after. I brought some gold, for us, to start a life.”
His thumb trailed up and down my temple, up and down slowly, so slowly. “Tae start a life...” He kissed me and then put his head down beside mine and seemed content to just lay there on me.
“Are we going to start our life now?” I teased.
He chuckled. “First I need tae calm m’self.”
“Oh, of course. Take your time.”
We sat there for a moment and then because the edge of his lips were close enough and I did think I wanted a taste of them again, I kissed the corner of his mouth.
He kissed me back and then groaned. “Wheesht, Madame Hayley, daena tease me.”